


Forever is a long time

by Vinushuka



Series: One year with Apocalyptica [23]
Category: Apocalyptica
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-13
Packaged: 2018-10-04 04:57:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10268777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vinushuka/pseuds/Vinushuka
Summary: Franky's accident on the final stretches of Apocalyptica's Australia tour makes Perttu realize his own vulnerability. He's not unbreakable either physically or mentally. Anyways the tour has given him new views and energy to tackle his problems at home. That energy is needed when it turns out that Anna has asked Patrik to move in with her and that Johanna knows about Anna and the baby.





	1. An accident on stage

## An accident on stage (1)

After my discussion with Eicca I decided to put on hold my idea of having a farm house in the countryside due to obvious risks involved with it. If I messed things up I would probably end up pissing off both Anna and Johanna. I should review my idea first with Anna and then find a suitable opportunity to take the matter up with Johanna. Instead I decided to concentrate on having fun with Franky who was supporting me unconditionally and without asking too many questions. In his arms I found peace of mind and could sleep my nights without having to be afraid of nightmares.

      After our show at Sydney we flew to Brisbane where we performed at Tivoli on Friday evening. The atmosphere before our Brisbane show was both relaxed and exited. Our tour was approaching the end and everything had gone smoothly so far. After one more show in Sydney we would fly back home and have some well-earned rest.

      “How’s your hand?” Franky asked when we were heading to the stage from our dressing rooms. For some reason the fingers of my left hand had started to ache after and even during playing in a show; again one of the signs that I wasn’t getting any younger.

“It’s fine at the moment”, I replied trying to convince myself that everything was alright. I had taken precautions and taped my fingers but that was just a temporary aid. I would have to consult a doctor latest before our long USA tour in April.

“Good luck and take care!” Franky smiled and slapped me in the back before entering the stage.

      Our show proceeded without problems and we were in high spirits, eager to please our enthusiastic Australian audience. Franky was singing ‘I’m not Jesus’ and putting his everything into the lyrics telling about sexual abuse when he suddenly vanished out of my sight. I was horrified when I realized that he must have fallen off the stage. I rushed towards the edge still playing my cello when I saw him climb back up looking slightly dazed but seemingly unharmed. He continued the song as if nothing had happened but I could see ha had a gush in his back oozing blood when he moved his arms. The next number on our set list was luckily instrumental so Franky could return back stage to get some first aid to his injury.

      I was happy that this time my hand didn’t hurt but Franky’s accident made me realize how fragile we humans actually were. At the beginning of our career we had mostly played in a sitting position like classical cellists but nowadays we were mostly standing when we played; that is the others were standing while I was lying on my back or crawling on the floor torturing my instrument. The audience of course loved it when I made love with my cello on stage which consequently encouraged me to take more and more risks. That was okay as long I was in good shape and didn’t hurt myself in making all those weird tricks but I should remember to be careful. I wasn’t unbreakable.

      “Oh shit! I have a huge bruise on my thigh”, Franky called from the bathroom when we were back at the hotel late in the evening. I hurried over to see how bad the situation was. His thigh and also hip were all purple and blue where he had landed on the floor.

“Does it hurt very badly?” I asked afraid to touch his bruised skin.

Franky raised his leg and swayed his hip to test the mobility. “Hmm, a little sore and stiff but otherwise okay”, he murmured concentrating on his sensations.

I wrecked my brain to find a way to help him. “I have some painkiller gel with me. I could spread it on the damaged areas to prevent the pain from kicking in during the night.”

“That would be kind of you”, Franky grinned with a twinkle in his eyes.

       I made Franky lie down on his healthy side and started to rub the gel onto his skin carefully not to hurt him. Franky lay on the bed quietly his eyes closed, but I could see his body reacting to my touch. When I was done with the treatment I went to the bathroom to wash my hands and then returned to sit on his bedside. “Would you like me to give you a blow job?” I asked folding my fingers around his half hardened dick.

“Yes, if you want to”, Franky mumbled and turned on his back. With a few firm strokes of my hand Franky was ready to make love with me. I pushed his thing into my mouth and caressed it with my tongue and lips.

“Hmmm…feels gorgeous”, Franky mumbled. He pushed his fingers into my hair and raised his butt to push himself deeper into my mouth.

“Take it easy”, I tried to restrain him but he didn’t listen to my advice. After that I just concentrated on bringing Franky to his climax. He fucked my mouth relentlessly and in the end exploded into it moaning of pleasure.

“Thanks, that was awesome!” he murmured and pulled my face towards his to kiss me. His kisses were so loving and gentle that they brought tears into my eyes.

“Jeez, I love you man!” I whispered thankful of all the support Franky had offered to me during these days in Australia. I wouldn’t have gone far without him.


	2. A threat called Patrik

## A threat called Patrik (2)

We had our last show in Australia at Sydney on Sunday. Franky was still stiff in his movements but otherwise he seemed to have recovered from his accident without complications. I enjoyed every minute we could spend together and I was happy about that. I had wanted to take some distance to my complicated life back home and succeeded in it very well. For the last couple of days my thoughts had been filled with Franky and Franky alone.

      I didn’t want to ruin the great feeling we had on our last day together with any serious discussions. I knew I was going to miss Franky but this time our separation wasn’t going to be long; our Mexico tour was only one and a half weeks away. So we spent the day in Sydney visiting local inhabitants like koalas and enjoyed brilliant sunshine and warmth before my return to the Finnish winter. Start of March typically meant sunshine and mild weather also in Finland and excellent skiing conditions in the northern parts of the country but I was looking forward to nice, slow rides on horseback in the countryside.

       I had reserved two riding sessions for Wednesday and Friday next week. Other than that there wasn’t much time for my hobbies. I and Eicca had two scheduled meetings at National Opera with Indigo team and of course I needed to spend some time with Anna. She hadn’t mentioned anything about the nanny search during our phone calls so I assumed nothing had happened in that area. I had bad conscience about not being able to contribute to the search during our tour. Eicca’s judgmental comments about my negligence kept bothering me although I knew that neither Eicca nor I could do much about it in Australia.

      When our plane landed in wintery Helsinki-Vantaa Airport I was anyways in a good mood and ready to tackle the challenges I had in my personal life. This time Anna wasn’t there to meet me because it was very early on Tuesday morning. I took a taxi and headed home to take care the usual chores like doing laundry and shopping groceries. My body was still running in Australian time assuming that it was Tuesday afternoon. I would hardly have adjusted to Finnish time when our Mexico tour would take us to a completely opposite time zone.

      I decided to visit the office to see Anna around noon time. I called her first thing in the morning to say hello and we agreed to have lunch together at the local restaurant. I had bought her a bracelet of aboriginal make and a tiny koala plush toy for Lumi.

“This is lovely. I wonder what these beads are”, Anna said and turned the bracelet around her slim wrist. It consisted of colorful beans suspended in a narrow leather strap. The earthy colors complimented perfectly her red hair and freckles.

“I loved it the minute I saw it. I bought one for myself too”, I said and showed her my own bracelet with mostly black and grey beads.

      When we had finished our lunch we enjoyed a cup of coffee before returning to the office. The plush toy I had given to Anna was sitting on the table between us looking adorable. I took it in my hand and finally asked the question that bothered me. “Have you had any luck with finding a nanny for Lumi?”

Anna stared at my hand or the koala in it considering what to say. “Actually there is one person that might be interested… at least he didn’t turn down my proposal immediately. He promised to give his answer within a month or so”, Anna explained blushing slightly.

Anna’s reaction made me feel uneasy and suddenly I realized I had seen that reaction before - when we talked about Patrik.

“Please don’t tell me you’ve asked Patrik to move in with you”, I finally said struggling not to lose my temper.

“What’s wrong with that? He wants to learn how to take care of babies and he is Lumi’s godfather anyway”, Anna defended her point.

“I know. It’s just that you two have a history… and he’s more than a friend to you...”

“Talking about friends… you’ve got Eicca, Mikko and Franky and now this Johanna…” Anna whispered her words quietly and calmly but I could sense her rage bubbling underneath.

“Perhaps it’s better that we continue this discussion later… ”, I proposed. I didn’t want to get into a fight with Anna and most of all I didn’t want to talk about Johanna with her right now.

“Yeah, maybe that’s better. Let’s talk more about this when I hear something from Patrik. He’s now very busy with the new guys from Japan. They arrived last Sunday”, Anna replied sounding a bit downcast.

“Can I come over to sauna next Saturday? I will have two riding sessions and two meetings with the Indigo team at Opera this week so I won’t have much spare time before the weekend. It would be nice to relax together with you.”

“Yes, of course. I can give you my special treatment if your muscles are sore after all that riding.”

“Speaking of which, you should have seen Franky. He fell off the stage and had huge bruises on his thigh and hip. I did my best to help him but he was really stiff in our last show at Sydney.”

       The tension between us vanished when we laughed together at poor Franky’s mishap but it would certainly come back if we changed the subject to Patrik or Johanna. The idea of Patrik with Anna was somehow too much for me. That guy was everything I wanted to be; young, beautiful and considerate and he had almost stolen Eicca from me. Now he wanted Anna!


	3. Forever is a long time

## Forever is a long time (3)

I had great difficulties to fall asleep on Tuesday night mostly because of the jetlag but also because I was nervous about seeing Johanna again. I was sure she had left things untold during our meeting at the restaurant just like I had done. I had no idea how willing and able she was to have a relationship with me. There might be some possessive boyfriend lurking in the background ready to turn up when least expected.

      Wednesday morning was sunny and brisk when I headed to the stables to meet Johanna and have a ride with her. Like last time she waited for me in front of the stables enjoying the warmth of the morning sun on her face. When I got out of the car she hurried to meet me and plunged directly into my arms. I held her surprised but happy. Her reaction was so genuine that I was convinced she really wanted to see me again. When she raised her face to look at me I just couldn’t resist the temptation to kiss her. She responded to my kiss with a passion that made my knees weak.

“So nice to see you again!” I whispered and stroke her cheek with my fingers.

“I missed you and our riding sessions together…” she confessed and lowered her brown eyes. Her shyness and warmth broke down all my defenses and left me speechless. “Why don’t we go and saddle Bruno for you. The weather is excellent for a ride”, Johanna finally proposed.

“Yeah, let’s do that”, was all I managed to say. My happiness made me almost giddy. Johanna took my hand and led me to the stables while I was trying to get my act together.

      We took a long ride around the estate and along the country roads in the neighborhood. I was much more tired than Johanna when we returned to the stables and groomed our horses after the ride.

“I’m hungry as a wolf. Why don’t we grab some lunch together”, I proposed encouraged by her eager kiss.

“I’m sorry, but I have my next lesson starting in half an hour”, she said after checking her watch. “But would you like to come for a dinner at my place sometime this week? I could cook us some Chinese.”

“Tomorrow night would be fine. I have a meeting at National Opera in the afternoon but after that I’m free”, I proposed my heart pounding of excitement.

“Tomorrow it is then. Let’s say six o’clock. Here’s my address”, she smiled and handed me her business card with the address written at the back.

“Thanks! I’ll be there at six”, I promised feeling dazed.

I had to breathe really deep before I was sure I was capable of driving home with my car. I was going to see her and her home tomorrow and she was going to cook for me. That was a lot more I had expected.

\-----

      I must admit I wasn’t much of an assistance to Eicca in our meeting with the Indigo team on Thursday afternoon. All I could think about was my dinner with Johanna: What should I wear? Should I buy some flowers? How should I act after our kiss? The questions were swirling around in my head together with the memories of her arms around me and my lips on hers…

      I was almost paralyzed by my excitement when I finally stood behind her door with a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates in my hand. I had to wait for a while to calm down my frantically beating heart before I had the courage to ring her doorbell. She opened the door almost immediately startling me and making me forget all that I was supposed to say. “Hi and welcome”, she said with a smile and grabbed my hand to lead me in.

      When I had recovered from the surprise I handed her the flowers and the chocolates and thanked her for the dinner invitation. She seemed equally confused and hurried to the kitchen to leave my presents there. Meanwhile I left my coat and shoes in the hallway and checked my appearance in the hall mirror. I had my hair free and I was dressed casually in jeans, white shirt and blue jacket. Not bad!

      When Johanna returned she rushed to hug me again. This time I was prepared for it so I could properly enjoy her closeness and lovely scent of her dark hair. “I hope you’re not allergic to flowers or chocolates”, I blurted noticing immediately that it was a stupid thing to say.

“No, I’m not. I love flowers and chocolates are my secret passion” she smiled and caressed my cheek. “You look lovely.”

       I could still feel her fingers on my cheek when she led me to sit on the living room sofa. She brought us glasses with sparkling water and we toasted as welcome. “I’m cooking my own vegetarian version of Kung Pao chicken with baked cheese. I hope it’s okay for you. If you like you can help me with it so that you don’t have to sit here alone”, she proposed.

“That’s fine. I’m pretty good at chopping vegetables …” I said and stood up from the sofa ready to do some serious cooking.

      I managed to chop the leeks and onions without accidents and mixed the cooking sauce while she was baking the chilies, salted peanuts, garlic and the cheese. I couldn’t resist planting a quick kiss on her cheek when she was concentrating in baking the chilies on the frying pan without burning them.

      We got our Kung Pao and the noodles going with it ready in no time and carried them over to the dinner table that was already set with colorful Chinese bowls and chopsticks.

“Am I supposed to eat with these?” I asked knowing that I was very clumsy in using chopsticks.

“Yes you are. I can teach you how to hold them properly. It’s easy once you get the hand of it.”

I liked very much the idea of her teaching me by the hand. I would definitely turn out to be a poor pupil…

      During our cooking and dinner I had time to look around me. There were definitely no signs of ex-boyfriends which made me wonder.

“I hope I’m not intruding into your life. I mean, you should tell me if there’s anyone else you’re seeing… ”, I finally opened the discussion.

“No, you’re not intruding and there isn’t anyone you should worry about. I’m free to do my own decisions”, she relied sounding very determined. “But I’m not so sure about you. There are rumors out there telling that you’re going to have a baby with a certain read headed woman”, she suddenly continued staring at her chopsticks.

My heart skipped a beat when I realized that the thing I had feared the most was now out in the open.

“The rumors are true. Anna is expecting our baby. Lumi is going to be born in June”, I admitted. There was no way I could lie about it or make the truth go away.

“Then why are you here?” she asked her voice breaking down. I could see a tear running down her cheek and it made me feel desperate.

“Because I couldn’t stay away. When I saw you and talked with you I knew I wanted to be with you, forever.”

“Forever is a long time… ”, she sniffled and wiped her face with her napkin.

“I know, but that’s how I feel. I want to have a family and grow old with you”, I blurted out the truth knowing that I sounded pathetic.

“But what about Anna? You can’t just leave her like that!”

“I’m going to take care of her and my responsibilities as a father but we are not going to get married or live together. We decided that already some time ago. She’s double your age and a very strong and independent woman.”

“I see… but isn’t she working for you?”

“Yes, she’s our assistant but only temporarily. She has a manager position in a Japanese company here in Helsinki area. Her employment with us expires at the end of August but she’s starting her maternity leave before that in the middle of May.”

“I’m not sure how I feel about all this. Maybe we should wait and see how you relationship with her develops after the baby has been born. I don’t want to be the person causing the breakup with you and your loved ones”, Johanna proposed sounding grave but somehow hopeful.

“I know how I feel but I don’t want to push you into anything that you don’t want. I can wait a couple of months if that’s what it takes”, I agreed feeling deep relief. She hadn’t turned me down immediately and was ready to give me a chance. What more could I ask for?


End file.
